If your man is aware of the fact that you want marriage, but still has not made the move in that direction, we don't reccomend you intensify your efforts to get him to the alter. If you've with this guy for three years, or five, or seven, we suggest you sit him down and have an honest conversation with him. Tell him how you feel. Let him know that you aren't pressuring him, but you've invested a great deal of time in your relationship, and as you have let him know in the past, you want it to lead to marriage. Ask him if he feels the same way. If he says no, then mission accomplished. No, you may not be happy with your answer, but now you can dump him, stop waisting time, and move on with your life. If he says yes, then there's still more information you need. How serious is he about marriage? When will the two of you get engaged? When will you marry? If you're worried that you may come off as pushy, don't. You've been with this man for three years, or five years, and you've let him know you've wanted marriage. Just because he hasn't given it to you, and now you're getting serious about attaining it, doesn't mean you're being pushy. So what if he says yes, he does want to marry you, but he's not willing to answer the questions? What if he says, "We can talk about that later," and he never talks about it later? What if every time you try to bring up the conversation again, he frowns and turns up the volume of the TV? If this happens, ladies, it's time to take action. And the action we say you chose is to get rid of him. Yes, we know you love him. You wouldn't have been with him for years if you didn't. But if it's marriage you want, then you need to leave, because understand, you won't be getting it from him. Our reason for saying this, is because, despite what you've heard, most every man wants to get married. He's just waiting for the perfect situation to come along. Some men will give the excuse, "I don't think I ever really want to get married." But if he stumbled upon a Playboy Bunny/movie star that made ten million dollars a year, was crazy about him, and wanted to marry him, do you think your boyfriend would tell her no? Of course he wouldn't. So what this proves is, not that your boyfriend is against marriage, he's just against marriage with you. What we believe women today have to understand is that marriage should never really need to be brought up by the woman. The man that is truly interested in you, will view you like that movie star, Playboy Bunny. He will be so delighted by you, so in love with you, that he will ask for your hand, wanting to take you off the market before another man can find out what a great catch you are and proposes. So for the man that you've been dating for years, been wanting to marry for years, but seems as though he does not want to marry, you have a decision to make. If you love him that much, and you're willing to put off your plans for marriage a year or two longer, you can continue on with him, hoping he'll later warm to the idea. But know you shouldn't continue to pester him, dropping hints about marriage, because when you asked him, he told you point blank he wasn't interested. You accepted that, end of story. Option number two--you could continue the relationship only for the benefits, knowing you'll never marry him. Meanwhile, you keep your eye out for a man who is serious about what you want, then replace your current man with the new one, turning your guy into a "bridge man" of sorts. We wouldn't suggest that, because it's just not nice. You last option--just walk away. We believe a woman should never have to ask whether a man is interested in her. You should also never have to wonder if your man wants to marry you. He should be excited about the idea, make you excited about it, too, then happily lower himself to one knee, ask for your hand and pray you say "yes!" You should never have to sell him, or convince him of why he should marry you. If you've done this, or are doing this, or plan to--stop it now! There is a man out there that wants exactly what you want, and when he finds you, you won't have to beg that man to give it to you.